GROW UP
MATURITY IN THE MESS
Pastor Jahmel K. Robinson
Scripture: James 1:2–8
CENTRAL MESSAGE
The goal of every difficult season should not simply be:
“How quickly can I get out of this?”
Sometimes the greater question is:
“What is God developing in me while I am in this?”
James teaches believers to allow perseverance to finish its work so that we become:
Mature.
Complete.
Lacking nothing.
The mess may be uncomfortable, but God can use what we experience to develop something in us.
So the prayer changes from only:
“God, deliver me from this.”
to:
“GOD, KEEP DEVELOPING ME IN THIS.”
Don't just get me out.
Grow me up.
KEY TEXT
JAMES 1:2–8
“Consider it pure joy...whenever you face trials...”
STUDY NOTE:
James does not pretend trials feel good.
The emphasis is on what God can produce through the trial.
A difficult season can become a developmental season.
“The testing of your faith produces perseverance.”
STUDY NOTE:
Pressure reveals faith.
Testing develops endurance.
Some spiritual strength cannot be developed without having something you must continue through.
The test is producing something.
“Let perseverance finish its work...”
STUDY NOTE:
Don't interrupt the developmental process simply because it becomes uncomfortable.
There may be something perseverance has not finished producing yet.
Ask:
What is this season developing in me?
“So that you may be mature and complete...”
STUDY NOTE:
The goal is:
MATURITY.
God is concerned about more than changing our circumstances.
He is developing our character.
Sometimes we want God to change what is around us while God is working on what is inside us.
“If any of you lacks wisdom...”
STUDY NOTE:
Maturity includes recognizing when:
I don't know what to do.
You do not have to pretend you have every answer.
Recognizing your need for wisdom is itself a sign of growth.
“You should ask God...”
STUDY NOTE:
When life becomes confusing:
Ask God.
When your back is against the wall:
Ask God.
When you do not know your next move:
Ask God.
Before reacting:
Ask God.
Before forcing something:
Ask God.
Before allowing everybody else's opinion to determine your decision:
ASK GOD.
“Who gives generously to all without finding fault...”
STUDY NOTE:
God does not shame you for needing wisdom.
Even if you should have asked Him earlier:
Ask now.
Even if you made the wrong decision:
Ask now.
Even if part of the mess is your own doing:
Ask now.
Past mistakes do not eliminate your present need for God's wisdom.
“But when you ask, you must believe and not doubt...”
STUDY NOTE:
Don't ask God for direction while secretly planning to do whatever you wanted to do anyway.
A sincere request for wisdom says:
“God, whatever You say, I am willing to follow.”
1. DON’T JUST PRAY TO GET OUT
The natural prayer in pain is:
“God, deliver me.”
“God, get me out.”
“God, make this stop.”
But James says:
Let perseverance finish its work.
That changes the prayer.
Instead of only:
“God, get me out of this.”
Pray:
“GOD, KEEP DEVELOPING ME IN THIS.”
WRITE THIS DOWN:
I don't want to leave the season before the season has taught me what I need to learn.
The question is not only:
“When will this end?”
Ask:
“Who am I becoming while I am in it?”
2. LET PERSEVERANCE FINISH
The text says:
“Let perseverance finish its work.”
That means perseverance has an assignment.
Something is being developed.
Something is being strengthened.
Something is becoming mature.
STUDY TRUTH:
Don't interrupt what God is developing because you are uncomfortable with how development feels.
There are lessons we learn through endurance that comfort cannot teach us.
3. SOME SEASONS ARE DEVELOPMENTAL
Pain can teach.
Waiting can teach.
Disappointment can teach.
Pressure can teach.
Mistakes can teach.
Trials can teach.
The question is whether we will become students in the season.
ASK YOURSELF:
What is this season teaching me about:
My faith?
My patience?
My attitude?
My relationships?
My decision making?
My dependence on God?
4. THE GOAL IS MATURITY
James does not simply say:
“Get through it.”
He connects perseverance with becoming:
Mature and complete.
That means spiritual maturity must become part of how we measure progress.
Progress is not only:
Did the problem disappear?
Progress can also be:
I respond differently now.
I pray before reacting now.
I recognize unhealthy patterns now.
I don't let everybody's opinion control me now.
I don't make decisions as quickly as I used to.
I have greater discernment now.
I can wait now.
That's growth.
5. YOUR BACK IS AGAINST THE WALL
Pastor Robinson moves from perseverance into the way we respond when we find ourselves in a jam.
When our backs are against the wall, we often immediately begin trying to escape through our own:
Power.
Energy.
Effort.
Strength.
And sometimes:
WE MAKE IT WORSE.
The moment we start putting our hands on everything, things become more complicated.
The moment we decide:
“I'll fix this myself,”
we may create another problem while trying to solve the first one.
REMEMBER:
Activity is not always wisdom.
Doing something does not automatically mean you are doing the right thing.
6. MATURITY KNOWS WHEN TO ASK FOR HELP
James says:
“If any of you lacks wisdom...”
Notice the honesty.
Sometimes:
I LACK WISDOM.
I don't know.
I don't understand.
I cannot see the whole picture.
I don't know which direction is best.
I need help.
Spiritual maturity does not mean pretending to know everything.
STUDY TRUTH:
One sign that you are growing up is becoming comfortable admitting that you need God's wisdom.
7. ASK GOD FOR WISDOM
James gives a simple instruction:
ASK GOD.
Before you make another move:
Ask God.
Before you respond:
Ask God.
Before you make the phone call:
Ask God.
Before you send the message:
Ask God.
Before you end something:
Ask God.
Before you begin something:
Ask God.
Before you make a major decision based entirely on emotion:
ASK GOD.
8. EVERYBODY HAS AN OPINION
When life becomes messy, everybody seems to know what you should do.
People will tell you:
What you should have done.
What they would have done.
What you did wrong.
What you need to do next.
Some will even give you the:
“I told you so.”
IMPORTANT:
Pastor Robinson does not say never seek counsel.
Wise counsel can be valuable.
But:
DON’T LET COUNSEL AND ADVICE OVERRULE GOD’S WISDOM.
People can advise you.
God must direct you.
9. GET DELIVERED FROM PEOPLE’S OPINIONS
Some decisions become difficult because we are trying to satisfy too many people.
We know what wisdom is saying, but we are worried about:
What they will think.
What they will say.
Whether they will understand.
Whether they will agree.
Whether they will be disappointed.
STUDY TRUTH:
Maturity requires becoming less controlled by people's opinions and more committed to God's will.
That does not mean becoming arrogant.
It means becoming spiritually secure.
10. WISDOM IS PRACTICAL
Pastor Robinson explains the Greek word associated with wisdom:
Sophia.
He uses the humorous connection to Sophia from The Golden Girls, a character known for giving wisdom and advice.
But the larger teaching is that wisdom has a practical dimension.
Sometimes you need:
PRACTICAL WISDOM.
Sometimes you need what Pastor describes simply as:
Common sense.
You don't need to overcomplicate everything.
Sometimes the prayer is:
“God, give me enough wisdom not to make this situation worse.”
11. DON’T OVERTHINK EVERY MOVE
There are times when we analyze ourselves into confusion.
We try to calculate every possible outcome.
We want to know everything before doing anything.
But wisdom is not always complicated.
Sometimes maturity means recognizing the obvious wise decision and having enough discipline to make it.
WRITE THIS DOWN:
Everything does not require a complicated answer. Sometimes I need God-given common sense.
12. WISDOM ALSO REQUIRES SPIRITUAL DISCERNMENT
Godly wisdom is not only practical.
Pastor Robinson describes it as:
Divinely inspired wisdom.
Wisdom with:
SPIRITUAL DISCERNMENT.
Discernment helps us recognize God's will.
The prayer becomes:
“God, help me know when You're moving and when You're not moving.”
Help me know:
What You said.
What You didn't say.
What You ordained.
What You didn't ordain.
What is for me.
What is not for me.
13. DON’T MOVE BEFORE GOD MOVES
One of the dangers of a messy season is impatience.
We become tired of:
Waiting.
Hurting.
Struggling.
Being uncertain.
So we move.
Pastor Robinson identifies the problem:
WE LIKE TO MOVE BEFORE GOD MOVES.
Why?
Because we think we know what is best.
Because we want relief.
Because we are tired of the situation.
Because we want something to happen.
14. STOP TRYING TO FAST TRACK YOUR DELIVERANCE
A major sermon phrase is:
“FAST TRACK OUR DELIVERANCE.”
We don't like the pain.
We don't like the waiting.
We don't like the uncertainty.
So we attempt to create our own escape.
We manipulate.
We force.
We settle.
We rush.
We choose something simply because we are tired of waiting for what God has.
STUDY TRUTH:
Impatience can move you outside God's will.
15. DON’T CONFUSE YOUR CHOICE WITH GOD’S CHOICE
Pastor Robinson uses relationships as an example.
Someone prays for God to send the right person.
God does not move according to their timetable.
They become impatient.
They choose someone.
Then the relationship becomes a problem.
And now the question becomes:
“God, why did You send this person?”
The lesson:
Sometimes God did not send what we chose.
WRITE THIS DOWN:
Don't blame God for a decision you made because you were tired of waiting on God.
16. DISCERN GOD’S MOVEMENT
Pastor Robinson's prayer is powerful:
Give me spiritual discernment to know when You're moving and when You're not moving.
This is maturity.
Not simply asking:
“Can I do this?”
But:
“Is God in this?”
Not simply:
“Do I want this?”
But:
“Does God want this for me?”
Not simply:
“Is the door open?”
But:
“Should I walk through it?”
17. KNOW WHAT IS FOR YOU
Discernment helps answer:
What is for me?
What is not for me?
Everything available does not belong to you.
Everything attractive is not assigned to you.
Everything offered is not ordained.
Every relationship is not supposed to continue forever.
Every opportunity is not your opportunity.
MATURITY QUESTION:
Does this belong in the life God is developing me to live?
18. KNOW WHO NEEDS TO STAY AND WHO NEEDS TO GO
Pastor Robinson makes discernment very practical.
There are relationships where wisdom is needed.
Who should remain?
Who should leave?
Who is helping?
Who is hindering?
Who is contributing to the journey?
Who is draining from the journey?
His sermon language even gets as practical as knowing:
Whose number to keep and whose number to delete.
IMPORTANT:
Discernment is not permission to become suspicious of everybody.
It is an invitation to stop being careless about who and what has access to your life.
19. DISCERN WHO IS HELPING AND WHO IS DRAINING
Pastor asks whether someone has been placed in your life to help you on your journey or whether the relationship has become parasitic.
That requires honest evaluation.
Some relationships:
Encourage growth.
Strengthen faith.
Provide accountability.
Tell the truth.
Support purpose.
Others may:
Drain.
Distract.
Manipulate.
Hinder.
Keep you connected to an old version of yourself.
ASK YOURSELF:
Is this relationship helping me mature or helping me remain immature?
20. WISDOM HAS A MORAL FOUNDATION
Pastor Robinson adds another dimension:
Godly wisdom is rooted in:
RIGHTEOUSNESS.
Wisdom is not merely:
“What works?”
The believer must also ask:
“What is right?”
Something can produce a temporary result and still take you outside God's will.
Maturity asks more than:
“Can I get away with this?”
Maturity asks:
“Does this honor God?”
21. GODLY WISDOM DOESN’T REQUIRE YOU TO VIOLATE YOUR CONVICTIONS
When we step outside God's will, Pastor notes that we can end up:
Doing things we have no business doing.
Going places we have no business going.
Making decisions that temporarily feel good but eventually produce guilt.
STUDY TRUTH:
God's wisdom will never require me to abandon righteousness in order to receive God's best.
22. STOP LETTING PEOPLE GUILT YOU
People can use guilt to keep you:
Longer than you should stay.
Going further than you should go.
Going deeper than you should go.
Doing something you know is not right for you.
Pastor Robinson challenges believers:
DON’T LET PEOPLE MAKE YOU FEEL GUILTY ABOUT WALKING IN GOD’S WILL.
If God has clearly directed you, other people's disappointment cannot become your compass.
23. GROW UP ENOUGH TO SAY NO
Sometimes maturity looks like:
No.
No, I cannot do that.
No, I cannot continue this.
No, this is not healthy.
No, this does not align with where God is leading me.
No, I cannot allow guilt to make my decision.
WRITE THIS DOWN:
A mature “no” can protect a God-given “yes.”
24. GOD GIVES WISDOM GENEROUSLY
James gives a promise.
God gives wisdom:
GENEROUSLY.
You are not bothering God when you ask for wisdom.
You are obeying Scripture.
You need wisdom for your family?
Ask.
Wisdom for relationships?
Ask.
Wisdom for work?
Ask.
Wisdom for ministry?
Ask.
Wisdom for finances?
Ask.
Wisdom for your next move?
ASK.
25. GOD GIVES WITHOUT REPROACH
Pastor Robinson emphasizes:
God does not respond:
“I told you so.”
He does not say:
“You didn't listen last time.”
He does not say:
“You created the mess, so figure it out.”
James says He gives:
WITHOUT REPROACH.
STUDY TRUTH:
God's willingness to give me wisdom is greater than my embarrassment about needing it.
26. YOUR PAST DOESN’T STOP YOU FROM ASKING NOW
Maybe you should have prayed before.
Maybe you should have waited.
Maybe you ignored a warning.
Maybe you made the wrong choice.
Maybe you created part of the mess.
The invitation remains:
ASK GOD FOR WISDOM.
Maturity is not pretending you never made the mistake.
Maturity is learning what to do next.
27. GROW BEYOND “I TOLD YOU SO”
People may remind you of what you did wrong.
God's invitation is toward wisdom for what comes next.
You cannot mature if you spend your entire life trapped in yesterday's mistake.
Learn.
Repent where necessary.
Receive wisdom.
Make the next decision differently.
REMEMBER:
The mistake can become part of your maturity if you learn from it.
28. ASK SINCERELY
Pastor Robinson then turns to the attitude behind the request.
When you ask God for wisdom:
MEAN IT.
Don't ask:
“God, what should I do?”
while thinking:
“But I'm probably going to do what I want anyway.”
A sincere prayer gives God permission to disagree with you.
29. DON’T ASK GOD TO COSIGN YOUR DECISION
Sometimes we are not seeking God's will.
We are seeking God's approval for our will.
We already decided.
We already chose.
We already know what we want.
Then we pray hoping God will endorse it.
STUDY TRUTH:
Seeking wisdom means being willing to receive an answer different from the answer I wanted.
30. SOMETIMES GOD GIVES THE ANSWER IN PIECES
Pastor Robinson teaches that sometimes God does not give the answer:
All at once.
Sometimes He gives:
One piece.
Then another.
One step.
Then another.
One part of the puzzle.
Then another.
This requires trust.
REMEMBER:
Partial direction still requires full obedience to the part God has revealed.
You do not always need step ten.
Sometimes you need enough faith to obey step one.
31. DON’T RETURN TO YOUR OWN UNDERSTANDING BECAUSE GOD IS TAKING TOO LONG
This is where many people struggle.
We ask.
We wait.
Nothing seems to happen.
Then we decide:
“I'll figure it out myself.”
And we return to the very thing James is teaching us to avoid.
MATURITY LOOKS LIKE:
Asking God.
Waiting.
Listening.
Trusting.
Not manipulating.
Not forcing.
Not creating an answer because silence makes you uncomfortable.
32. ASK IN FAITH
James says:
When you ask, believe.
Believe God can give wisdom.
Believe God can direct you.
Believe God knows what you cannot see.
Believe God knows where the decision will lead.
Believe God knows what is ahead.
STUDY TRUTH:
If I trust God with my future, I must learn to trust God's wisdom for my next move.
33. DON’T BE DOUBLE-MINDED
James describes the doubting person as unstable, like a wave being tossed.
Pastor Robinson connects that instability to the person who keeps moving between:
God's will
and
my will.
One moment:
“God, tell me what to do.”
Next moment:
“Never mind. I'll handle it.”
One moment:
“I'm waiting on God.”
Next moment:
“God is taking too long.”
That produces confusion.
34. WAIT FOR THE ANSWER
One of the strongest closing instructions of the sermon is:
WAIT.
If you ask God what your next move should be:
Wait for the answer.
Wait for the Lord to speak.
Wait for direction.
Wait for wisdom.
Wait for God to communicate your next move.
WRITE THIS DOWN:
Don't create an answer because waiting makes you uncomfortable.
35. A GOD-GIVEN DECISION BRINGS FREEDOM
Pastor Robinson describes what happens when you know you waited for God's wisdom.
The next season feels different.
The burden is lighter.
The mind is clearer.
Why?
Because you can say:
“I know this is what God told me to do.”
“I know this is where God wants me.”
“I know I'm walking in God's will.”
That produces freedom.
36. WHEN YOU KNOW IT’S GOD, PEOPLE’S OPINIONS LOSE POWER
When you know you have sought God sincerely...
When you know you waited...
When you know you received wisdom...
When you know your decision aligns with God's will...
You do not have to live bound by everybody's opinion.
They may disagree.
They may misunderstand.
They may talk.
But your confidence is:
“I’M WALKING IN THE WILL OF GOD.”
37. MATURITY IN THE MESS
Bring the entire sermon together.
The mess exposes us.
The mess tests us.
The mess pressures us.
But the mess can also mature us.
In the mess, learn to:
Persevere.
Ask for wisdom.
Use discernment.
Stop listening to every voice.
Stop forcing outcomes.
Stop fast tracking deliverance.
Make righteous decisions.
Learn from mistakes.
Ask sincerely.
Believe God.
Wait for direction.
Walk in God's will.
The goal is not simply:
GET OUT.
The goal is:
GROW UP.
STUDY THE MOVEMENT
TRIAL
↓
Let perseverance work
PERSEVERANCE
↓
Develops maturity
MESS
↓
Don't immediately try to fix everything yourself
LACK OF WISDOM
↓
Ask God
TOO MANY OPINIONS
↓
Let God's wisdom have the final word
DECISION
↓
Use practical wisdom
UNCERTAINTY
↓
Seek spiritual discernment
IMPATIENCE
↓
Don't fast track deliverance
RELATIONSHIPS AND OPPORTUNITIES
↓
Discern what is for you and what is not
GUILT
↓
Walk in God's will
PAST MISTAKES
↓
Ask again without shame
PRAYER FOR WISDOM
↓
Ask sincerely
DELAYED ANSWER
↓
Wait
GOD-GIVEN WISDOM
↓
Move in faith
RESULT
↓
MATURITY IN THE MESS
WORKBOOK: WHERE AM I MATURING?
The area where I can see the most spiritual growth:
An area where I am still responding immaturely:
What God may be developing:
WHAT IS MY CURRENT MESS?
The situation causing the most pressure:
What I wish God would immediately change:
Instead of only asking God to get me out, I am asking Him to develop:
WHERE DO I NEED WISDOM?
The decision I need to make:
What I already know:
What I do not know:
My prayer for wisdom:
WHOSE VOICE IS TOO LOUD?
The person whose opinion affects me most:
What they are saying:
What I fear will happen if they disagree:
What I need to ask God:
DISCERNMENT CHECK
GOD, HELP ME KNOW...
What is for me:
What is not for me:
Who needs to stay:
What may need to go:
What is helping my growth:
What is hindering my growth:
When to move:
When to wait:
AM I FAST TRACKING SOMETHING?
Something I am tired of waiting for:
Why I want it now:
What I am tempted to force:
What could happen if I move without wisdom:
What trusting God's timing would look like:
LEARNING FROM THE MESS
A mistake I made:
What it taught me:
What pattern I need to stop repeating:
The wiser response next time:
IS MY REQUEST SINCERE?
I am asking God for wisdom concerning:
The answer I personally want is:
If God gives me a different answer, am I willing to obey?
What surrender looks like for me:
WHAT AM I WAITING ON GOD FOR?
While I wait, I will not:
While I wait, I will:
KEY STUDY TRUTHS
Trials can become developmental seasons.
Perseverance has a work to finish.
The goal is maturity and completeness.
Sometimes the prayer needs to change from “Get me out” to “Develop me in this.”
Trying to fix everything ourselves can make the mess worse.
Maturity knows when to ask God for wisdom.
Human counsel should never overrule God's wisdom.
Wisdom includes practical judgment.
Wisdom includes spiritual discernment.
Discernment helps us recognize God's will.
Impatience can cause us to move before God moves.
Don't fast track your deliverance.
Everything available is not necessarily for you.
Godly wisdom is rooted in righteousness.
Don't allow guilt to move you outside God's will.
God gives wisdom generously.
God gives wisdom without reproach.
Your past mistakes do not prevent you from asking God for wisdom today.
Ask sincerely.
Don't ask God for wisdom while planning to do your own thing anyway.
Sometimes God's answer comes piece by piece.
Ask in faith.
Wait for God's answer.
A God-given decision produces freedom and clarity.
Don't just go through the mess. Grow through the mess.
KEY SERMON LANGUAGE
“Let perseverance finish its work.”
“God, keep developing me in this.”
“Until You finish working on me.”
“Ask God for wisdom.”
“Don't let the counsel and advice overrule God's wisdom.”
“Give me wisdom.”
“Give me spiritual discernment.”
“Know when You're moving and when You're not moving.”
“Know what You said and didn't say.”
“Know what You ordained and didn't ordain.”
“Know what's for me and what ain't for me.”
“Know who needs to stay and who needs to go.”
“Don't let people make you feel guilty about walking in God's will.”
“He will give it to you generously.”
“He will give it to you without reproach.”
“When you ask for wisdom, make sure it's sincere.”
“Don't ask Him with the intention of doing your own thing.”
“Sometimes He gives you the pieces to the puzzle.”
“When you ask, believe.”
“Wait for the answer.”
“Wait for the Lord to speak.”
“Wait for the Lord to give you what He wants you to do next.”
“Wait for the Lord to communicate your next move.”
“I'm walking in the will of God.”
STUDY TAKEAWAY
I do not want to waste the mess.
When life becomes difficult, my prayer will not only be for God to get me out. I will ask God to grow me up while I am in it.
I will let perseverance finish its work.
I will recognize the places where I still need maturity.
When I don't know what to do, I will stop pretending that I have every answer.
I will ask God for wisdom.
I will receive wise counsel, but I will not allow people's opinions to overrule God's wisdom.
I will ask God for practical wisdom.
I will ask Him for spiritual discernment.
I want to know what is for me and what is not for me.
I want to recognize what God has ordained and what He has not ordained.
I will stop trying to fast track my deliverance simply because waiting is uncomfortable.
I will not force relationships, opportunities, decisions, or doors because I am tired of waiting.
I will seek wisdom rooted in righteousness.
I will not allow guilt to keep me somewhere God is telling me to leave or push me into something God never told me to do.
When I make mistakes, I will learn from them.
I will remember that God still invites me to ask for wisdom.
When I ask, I will ask sincerely.
I will not ask God what He wants while secretly planning to do what I want.
If His answer is different from mine, I want the maturity to choose His answer.
And if the answer does not come immediately:
I WILL WAIT.
I will wait for the Lord to speak.
I will wait for God-given wisdom.
I will wait for my next move.
Because I don't simply want a quick decision.
I WANT A GOD-GIVEN DECISION.
And when I know I have sought God, waited on God, heard from God, and followed God, I can walk forward without being controlled by everybody else's opinions.
I can say:
“I’M WALKING IN THE WILL OF GOD.”
This mess will not be wasted.
This trial will teach me.
This pressure will develop me.
This waiting will mature me.
This experience will make me wiser.
I WILL NOT JUST GO THROUGH IT.
I WILL GROW THROUGH IT.
GOD, DON’T JUST GET ME OUT.
GROW ME UP IN IT.